Take a Sip
by Why the Rum is Gone
Summary: Read this, watch the movies and take a sip... Caffiene is your friend


Pyro Lady Tequila: First of all, we do not own Lord of the Rings, although we DO own copies of the books and Extended Edition DVDs of FotR and TTT. ^_^ Also, we mean no disrespect to anyone involved in the Lord of the Rings films. Anything that could be taken the wrong way, we assure you, is meant only in innocent jest.  
  
Bob the Cat: I love Frodo and Merry. No, really, I do. If you are either one of those people, contact me. And happy 56!  
  
Pyro Lady Tequila: Well, if you're going to go on like that, I might as well add that Pippin is welcome to contact me at any time. I'll give you food.  
  
Bob the Cat: I don't suppose I'll get my hopes up though. Most people mistake my love for stalking.  
  
Pyro Lady Tequila: It is true. Poor innocent fangirls that we are.  
  
(Best when used with a high-caffeine beverage such as SunDrop. If you don't know what that is, I pity you.) Have a sip.  
1. Every time you see Legolas nancing  
2. Every time Pippin looks like a cat  
3. Every time Sam says something endearing to Mr. Frodo  
4. Every time Frodo yells "Sam!!"  
5. Every time you see a close-up of Frodo's eyes, or a very very close  
close-up of his face  
6. Every time you see a close-up of the ring  
7. Every time the ring does something unnatural  
8. Every time you see someone smoking a pipe  
9. Every time Merry and Pippin do something cute  
10. Every time Merry and Pippin make you laugh  
11. Every time you laugh and you're not supposed to  
12. Every time it shows a close-up of someone's eyes or extreme close-up  
of their face, and it isn't Frodo (2)  
13. Every time you see an elf that isn't blonde  
14. Every time you see Figwit  
15. Every time you think about bicycle seats  
16. Every time someone other than Legolas nances (2)  
17. Every time you find yourself fancying a hobbit  
18. Every time you find yourself thinking one of the hobbits is hot (2)  
19. Every time it shows a close-up of a hobbit foot  
20. Every time it shows a close-up of something dead  
21. Every time you want to hug a hobbit  
22. Every time you start thinking you want a pet hobbit  
23. Every time you start thinking you want something else as a pet  
(dwarf, pony, eagle, etc.)  
24. Every time it shows someone eating  
25. Every time a hobbit expresses a desire to eat  
26. Every time anything else expresses a desire to eat (2)  
27. Every time it shows food  
28. Every time it shows people drinking  
29. Every time Sam and Gollum/Smeagol argue or yell at each other  
30. Every time someone looks alarmed  
31. Every time someone looks distressed  
32. Every time someone cries or looks on the point of tears  
33. Every time you spot Merry and/or Pippin at Bilbo's birthday party  
34. Every time you wonder how long it's been since Aragorn has seen soap  
35. Every time Aragorn actually looks clean (3)  
36. Every time something about an orc creeps you out or makes you laugh  
37. Every time you wish you could do a reasonable impression of Gollum  
38. Every time Frodo looks like he's on drugs  
39. Every time you feel contemptuous of Legolas  
40. Every time you see something ugly (individual orcs don't count)  
41. Every time you see a map  
42. Every time you see letters of another language (Elvish, Dwarvish,  
etc.)  
43. Every time you find yourself thinking, "Damn, that's cool."  
44. Every time someone goes strange because of the Ring  
45. Every time you get thirsty  
46. Every time you wish you had an accent like one of the characters or  
actors  
47. Every time someone sings; 3 if it's Billy (Pippin)  
48. Every time you see Gandalf and he's actually wearing his hat  
49. Every time Billy screams like a girl (2)  
50. Every time you wish one of the Elves would do something crude and  
improper  
51. Every time Frodo falls down  
52. Every time you see an apple  
53. Every time someone looks determined  
54. Every time Merry yells "Pippin!!"  
55. Every time Pippin yells "Merry!!"  
56. Every time a light breeze picks up indoors  
57. Every time you find yourself starting up a game of Tig (3) 


End file.
